SELF IMPROVEMENT
I’m Getting Over You: Moving On and Never Looking Back
Whether it’s a failed situationship or the end of a long-term relationship, one thing’s for sure: the “moving on” stage sucks. Who hasn’t felt hungover from a past love?
As we get through that stage, many might say that time will help heal the scars. However, the recovery period can be agonizing. Some days are easier than others, and the ugly moments feel magnified because of the pain you’re trying to eliminate.
Why does the “I’m getting over you” stage feel painful? How can one come out of it as a stronger person?
The Sting of Getting Over Someone
Does the heartbreak still linger within you? If so, these reasons may provide some clarity behind your painful feelings.
One, it invites desperation. No one expects their relationships to end badly. With that, some of us look for ways to get the feeling of love back. But unfortunately, efforts aren’t always reciprocated, adding to the pain.
Two, heartbreak makes us lose control of our feelings. This is in line with the desperation in point #1. Since you’re lost in the hurt, all rational thoughts go out the door as you yearn for love and attention.
And three, you’re left feeling stuck in the past. You’re surrounded by memories of your ex, from photos down to specific locations. It’s as if everything around you is a reminder of what once was, and you can’t break through that loop.
Get a Clean Slate
We know getting over someone is easier said than done — especially if your breakup happened out of the blue. Letting go of feelings (especially unresolved ones) can feel like ripping off the bandage of a painful wound, but it’s necessary.
#1: Acknowledge and accept the circumstances
You can’t move on if you can’t make peace with reality. As said in a previous entry, don’t hold onto something that no longer exists. You can only move on when you finally accept reality, no matter how bad it hurts.
#2: Lean on reliable support
It can be tempting to shut everyone out while you’re in pain. However, here’s a friendly reminder: you don’t have to bear the pain alone.
Surround yourself with people who truly care about your happiness because they have your back — no questions asked. Always remember that your family and friends are always there to comfort and support you.
#3: Step out of your bubble
Just because you’re nursing a broken heart doesn’t mean you should stop living your life. Make the most of your newfound freedom by trying new things! There’s no harm in going out of your comfort zone from time to time, so what better time than the present?
#4: Don’t make things harder for yourself
It’s easy to point the finger at yourself during times like this. But here’s something you should remember: none of your pain is your fault. Don’t fall into self-sabotaging behavior because you’ll only make moving on more difficult. Treat yourself with kindness because you deserve it — especially after heartbreak.
#5: Have faith and embrace optimism
Reliving the past and hoping for a comeback will only hinder your progress. Channel your energy into a better future for yourself. You have so much more to live for, and that includes better relationships.
Whether someone’s getting over you or you’re the one in the moving-on process, we owe ourselves time to get through such a stage. There’s no rush, so go at your own pace. This isn’t a contest.
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