PSYCHOLOGY
Exude Main Character Energy for Better Dating Experiences
For some of us, dating in 2024 has become a drag.
Yes, love can come in with just a few swipes. A Forbes and OnePoll survey on dating revealed that 45% of its respondents met fellow daters on online apps. Meanwhile, 27% admitted to bumping into singles on social media.
However, some can only take so much sliding in the DMs, as online dating burnout continues to plague even the most eager singles.
So, how does one overcome this disappointing and frustrating hump?
Channel your favorite love stories and unleash your main character energy.
What Does This Mean?
The number one rule when writing a story is not to lay out your plot first; it’s to flesh out your characters.
Similarly, that’s what this dating mindset means.
According to Gen Zs and millennials, the originators of the trend, harnessing your main character energy means putting yourself first to better prepare for entering another person’s orbit.
Most good things require effort, so you should get things done yourself without letting obstacles stop you. You’re not a right-hand guy or gal. Don’t confine yourself to that role; this is your plot.
Being a main character is about healthy self-investment. Bet on yourself; that’s always a jackpot.
Why Be The Hero/Heroine of Your Story?
Donning your cape does wonders, especially in your dating life.
First, it’s a sure-fire confidence booster. Nothing screams “self-assurance” more than rocking your own (mental) crown. You know you look good and feel great about yourself, so why deny that?
You set the terms for your happiness. You know your value and believe in it. You’re a catch, so don’t let anyone tell you otherwise!
Second, it ensures you have control over your narrative. You know when and how to put your foot down on your boundaries and non-negotiables. People-pleasing is the last thing on your mind, allowing you to narrow down your choices in matches.
Yes, standing up for yourself isn’t a revolutionary idea; everyone should do that. But it’s still admirable nonetheless. Why be a passive bystander when you can be in the driver’s seat?
How to Be the Protagonist in Your Love Story
#1: Reconnect with yourself
This first step is necessary, especially if you’ve become accustomed to prioritizing others. Ask yourself about your current likes, needs, non-negotiables, and lessons from past relationships.
#2: Make a checklist of your ideal partner
List down whatever you need to list — from traits to principles — to save time by weeding out nonsense.
#3: Be specific
Make the most of the platforms you’re using by being straightforward with your wants and needs. Some apps have features that allow users to share them in detail through questionnaires. You can attempt this offline as well. Just get straight to the point — people will appreciate it.
#4: Heed the warnings seriously
Stop rationalizing red flags; there’s no point in doing so, and it’s a complete waste of your time.
#5: Raise the hard questions as soon as possible
You don’t have to feel bad for asking the hard questions if you ask respectfully. If your match is mature enough, they’ll understand why.
Exuding main character energy for future love isn’t as selfish as some assume it is. There’s nothing wrong with wanting good things for yourself — dating life included. Go ahead and write your happy ending with your future partner.
Reference
Prendergast, Carly. 2024. “The State Of Dating In America In 2024: Emotional Cheating Ranks Higher Than Physical Cheating.” Forbes Health. https://www.forbes.com/health/dating/state-of-dating/.
