PSYCHOLOGY
Are They Playing Mind Games? Heed These Warnings
One minute, your partner is affectionate and attentive, the next, it’s like they suddenly flip a switch and have become irritating and aggressive. And unfortunately, this isn’t new to you. It has been a long-time habit of theirs since the beginning of your relationship.
The above scenario is an example of a person playing mind games.
As beautiful as vulnerability is, some people put up walls against it for various reasons. Their barriers act as defense mechanisms against manipulators. Unfortunately, that defense has a side effect: it pushes well-meaning people away too.
How can one tell if their partner is playing tricks on them? These signs should be enough to sound the alarm.
Why Do Some People Like to Play Mind Games?
Before I point out the signs, I’d like to clarify that most people aren’t out to play mind games. They’re usually an expression of one’s ambivalence towards their partners (and by extension, their relationships).
For some people, mind games are, in their eyes, a justifiable means to an end. Regardless of their desire, they see no other way to achieve it but through manipulation.
Other people play mind games because they like controlling someone. The power gives them confidence and adrenaline. Seeing their victims feel weak gives them satisfaction.
In other cases, mind games are played because some want to feel needed. They want to create a false sense of intrigue to keep their victims on their toes and make them chase them. An example of this is playing hard-to-get with a match.
Anyone on the receiving end of this treatment will naturally feel confused. Instead of enjoying the relationship, they’ll spend most of their time figuring it out. It’s as if it’s a complicated Rubik’s cube puzzle that’s impossible to solve.
And with that, people keep their guard up all the time to avoid being blindsided. Being careful is one thing, but walking on eggshells all the time is another. You don’t want to be in that position.
4 Signs Someone Is Playing Mind Games in a Relationship
Catch manipulators in the act through these hints:
#1: They often flake out
There’s a clear difference between bailing on an event with permission and constant flaking. Some situations leave people with no choice but to take rain checks because of life’s unpredictability.
If one makes bailing a habit, that should be taken as a red flag. It’s a clear sign that one party doesn’t care about the other’s feelings.
#2: They come and go
Hot and cold behavior is a tale as old as time. When someone’s into a person, they tend to go all out. But when they withdraw, they act as if the object of their desire doesn’t even exist. If that sounds confusing, that’s because it is.
#3: Only one party is pulling the rope
Picture this: one person is always the one initiating meetups and other plans. If they stop their effort, they won’t hear a peep from the other. And here’s the kicker: they always respond!
#4: Constant comparisons
If one party always compares the other person to different people, that’s a power-tripping move. It’s a subtle mind game designed to undermine one’s confidence in order to control them.
Playing mind games is a waste of people’s time at the expense of their sanity. Don’t allow yourself to be victimized by a partner who is willing to play with your emotions for their own selfish needs.