RELATIONSHIPS
Taking Things Slow Is the Way to Go in Relationships
Does slow and steady win the race?
For many couples, the answer is yes.
Everyone takes relationships at different paces, but some prefer taking things slow. It may seem tedious, but hear me out here: what’s the rush? Love’s not a contest.
Healthy relationships need full development. Achieving that means allowing things to play out at their own pace. It may not seem sexy, but it’s more enduring than passionate physical affairs.
There’s a lot to gain from pacing yourselves in your relationships. And it doesn’t mean it’s boring either. Who says it can’t be interesting?
Here’s what you should know about slowing things down.
Why Pump the Brakes?
People have their reasons for moving slowly. Below are some of the most notable/common ones:
#1: Better understanding
You can’t skip the getting-to-know-each-other part of relationships. I know how much you want to act on your feelings, but slow down! You will get to that. Learn what makes your partner tick while allowing them to do the same thing for you.
#2: Introspection
What are your wants and needs? What are your partner’s preferences and priorities? Taking things slow in a relationship helps you both figure out what you’re looking for before diving deep.
#3: Proper expectation setting
You don’t want to ruin a good thing by rushing in. Moving fast can make for hard landings. You and your partner may have different expectations going into your relationship, so pacing yourselves will do you both favors.
#4: Recovery
More often than not, people in relationships take things slowly because they’re reeling from past heartbreaks. Jumping into new people quickly can give them mental and emotional whiplash, so don’t get upset when some take a while to open their hearts again.
#5: Boundaries
Boundaries exist, and not without reason. For one, people have different comfort levels. One may be ready to make a bold step, while the other isn’t just as prepared.
Slowing down helps couples adjust to each other’s limits without the pressure. It also makes for more enjoyable experiences.
How to Take Things Slow in a Relationship
Taking things slow isn’t rocket science, but it can be pretty confusing if you’re not on the same page. Match each other’s timelines with these tips:
1. Share your reasons
Is taking it slow a bad sign? Absolutely not! The reasons mentioned above (and many others) are all justifiable.
Have an honest conversation with your match/partner about your sentiments to start things off on the right foot. If their feelings are genuine, they will hear you out. Encourage them to share their thoughts, too.
2. Add space and pace
I know you’re curious about each other (which is great), but you don’t want to burn yourselves out. You don’t need to be stuck like glue 24/7.
Spending more quality time together is great, but a little distance wouldn’t hurt. This keeps relationships exciting and more manageable.
3. Keep yourselves in check
Don’t go full speed ahead if you want to see how things play out. Practice self-restraint to make sure you’re not making rash decisions but informed ones based on what’s best for both of you. Taking time to think about things ensures you’ll make the right choices most of the time.
Taking things slow is a good thing. You don’t want to jump the gun and go into a relationship blindly. If you want things to last longer, give it time to simmer. Love isn’t and shouldn’t be a race.
