PSYCHOLOGY
The Triangle Method | A Flirting Tactic, Explained
Some feelings are best expressed nonverbally. Why say something when your body is doing the talking for you?
Let’s say you’re on a night out with friends at your favorite bar. While drinking and having a good time, you notice someone a few tables away looking you in the eye before moving their gaze down to your mouth.
Before you panic, hear me out: no, you don’t have anything stuck between your teeth. They may just be putting the triangle method to the test.
What is this tactic? Is it part of the numbers game or something else entirely?
What Is the Triangle Method?
Many are unaware of this method, so here’s a definition.
The triangle method is a flirting tactic where you make your interest in someone clear by gazing deliberately into their eyes, then to their lips, and back again.
Think of it like connecting the dots on someone’s face.
As I said in the introduction, nonverbal cues sometimes say things better than words. You can apply this logic to flirting. You can say all the pickup lines you want, but they’re more impactful when accompanied by genuinely charismatic body language.
The Origins of the Method
Like many modern dating trends, this flirting tactic arose on the Internet. The method went viral on TikTok, with the subject having over 20 million views as of this writing.
Various clips show users, ranging from dating coaches to ordinary daters, testifying about the tactic’s effectiveness. There’s even a video claiming that Marilyn Monroe allegedly gave the method a go! Is this a sign to give it a test run?
How to Use the Triangle Method of Flirting in Real Life
This method’s starting point varies from person to person. However, a Women’s Health piece says most people recommend doing it this way: start by looking at the subject’s left eye, then the right. Glance down at their lips before returning your gaze to their left eye.
As tactical as this method is, try your best to execute it naturally. Here are some tips to help you employ the tactic:
#1: Slow is the way to go.
The method can be too obvious, so the best way to utilize it is at a gradual pace. You don’t want them to catch you darting at parts of their face. That’s creepy.
#2: Go through practice runs.
Before you use it on real people, try practicing in front of the mirror. Get the hang of it to make your execution more organic.
#3: Be mindful of the rest of your body.
Your eyes may be doing most of the talking here, but that doesn’t mean the rest of your body should stay silent. Body language doesn’t just stop with one gesture. Your posture, facial expressions, and other cues matter, too.
If the method’s numerous TikTok videos are anything to go by, it’s safe to say it works — to a degree. Despite the subtlety, the intentional nature of your eye contact is enough to leave an impact.
However, the triangle method shouldn’t be a be-all and end-all approach to flirting. It works best when there’s a real attraction, connection, and open communication from both parties. Remember, it takes two to tango.
Reference
Sobol, Beth. 2023. “How To Use The Triangle Method To Flirt With Anyone And Everyone.” Women’s Health. https://www.womenshealthmag.com/sex-and-love/a45876709/triangle-method-flirting/.
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